perhaps love

(NOTE: i try not to write mushy stuff here so this is quite safe despite the title. heehee. :))

m and i couldnt find a decent movie when we saw each other last time, (a rarity these days). anyway, we had dinner and went back to his crib and there he showed me a new DVD movie. and to my surprise (NOT), its chinese. i asked him whats the film about, he said its a love story (i think this should stop me from taking a nap), maybe he had sensed that i am not too happy with yet another chinese film, he told me that he didnt screen this and we will watch it together and because this is a love story, he waited until that day we are together to watch it. (people, this man cant stand having an unwatched film in his possession, so this could be something). this is a pretty decent movie, reminds me of moulin rouge, but with subtitles. heheh. its a great film. tho' i was telling m that the ending suck, could be because im used to those kinds of endings. nyahaha. whatever.

another surprise popped out in this movie: a really crushable japanese, a real one for a change. (i used to have a thing for kenshin himura ^_^'). hehehe. i just dont have the heart to tell m that i have crush on mr. takeshi here because the ex of his buddy already adores her. i mean boys just cant take it that we girls would fall overselves over one guy or two. all i know i have one word for this guy, mr takeshi: SWEET!

will blog about my date with elaine & tabs when i get ahold of the pics. SHOUTOUTS TO: jan & annie. SHOW YOURSELVES!!!!

a quick one.

lately i was plagued by paranoia, i don't know who to turn to just because of the mere reason that i'm afraid that talking to other people would make me even more paranoid and worry. with all the relentless job orders that still keeps on piling and me morphing into a gym rat, this is no surprise.
i was taking to j online for days now and i told her i'm paranoid, but didn't tell her why. but she keeps on asking and asking until i finally told her. and i was glad that i did. since, she understood were i'm coming from and she assured me that i am just paranoid.
now, if what im waiting for finally comes along i'd be happier. im glad i have someone like her to turn to.
shoutouts to j: miss you na. pakita ka na sakin!!!! hehhee! mwah.

not your typical love letter

my mobile shouts at me to inform me that i have a sms

m: you've got mail :)

i checked my yahoo mailbox (no new mail)

me: wer did u send it? wala naman e

m: sa gmail mo

so checked my mailbox and lo and behold, he does have an email. i silently prayed that it was the favor i asked him to do for me, (flashback: i dont have a profile for my page and i asked him to make me one) and so it was.see, i always wondered how m writes. and now i know why despite the temper all of his exs and bosses loved him. and why all his friends wanted him to go back to the ad agency. i didnt know m thinks of me this way, i just know he finds me funny, his personal chef, somebody to harrass (hehe. joke!). basically, his best budd only a girl. i have to say my heart swelled after i read his mail.

im blessed to have him. and im thankful he loves me.

here's the contents of his email:

If Francis were a song, she would be in one of the better albums of U2. None of the forced sentimentality of pop divas, devoid of the repetitive lameness of boy bands, free of the pointless anger of metal groups. She would be a song that can only get better every time you hear it; and the passage of years would only give it the distinction of being a classic. Don't let her youth or her quiet demeanor fool you: her ideas are fresh but insightful, her words few but necessary, her actions mannered but purposeful. She does not categorize tasks as either trivial or herculean-- she attends to everything that is expected of her with undivided attention, and rewards herself with rest only when the job is done and done well. Even if her mind has already absorbed enough of what's good and useful, she can still sponge up fresh starts or points of inspiration from conversations or carefully chosen books and films. If someone wrote her biography now, it would be many chapters away from an ending; but the existing manuscript would already make for interesting reading. Charming. Smart. Sweet. Generous. Sexy. Above all else, she's real and she's got soul. If these aren't enough to make a person beautiful, I have no idea what would. (love you, kulit)

aww! im a goner! :)

chilli papa

obviously, i loved the munich movie (not for kids).
the lead character's (eric bana) role is so hot. for me, that is, bacause he can cook gourmet dishes and look great with or without clothes. hehehe. the movie was a way for me to know that m wouldn't buy me a huge kitchen because its not a kitchen, it's a room! hehehe. i still would want a huge kitchen where i could cook and make great grub. as for m, he will be eating take out for the rest of our lives. nah. kidding. :)

sunday morning snaps

to those who doesnt have any access on my photobucket. here are the photos to go with my one sunday morning post. hehehe.
enjoy!
hmm... i wish i could have time to go out of town and not worry about stuff.


jeez, whose toes are these? (before shot)

ayan... hindi na paa ng maglulupa! hehheeh! model: tabs' toes

we, the shopaholic! cute naman!

my starbucks bud.

ang kulet!

look at the cutie we picked up there? his name is bearista

the mess we made at starbucks! hehehe!

kame ang pugante ng megamall

galing ng photographer ko

somebody told me i looked toned in this top. sana bilin nya to para sakin. hehehe.

one sunday morning.

NOTE: our net has been infected by a bug. that is the reason why i have over a hundred unread emails and its been ages since i last made a post. well, now im back. glad to be. ^_^ i have a lot to write about and i dunno where to start. heehee.

tabs and i met up in megamall (erhm, i woke up way earlier than usual) with a mission, that we would give our toes a much needed pedicure. (pano naman, parang hindi paa ng babae, mukha nang paa ng magsasaka) hehehe. it was sooooooooo much fun to spend money and be pampered. but more than that, it's spending time with a great friend. i miss my girl-friends (lalo na si jan and annie). having a boyfriend who loves me is great hut there are times that i need my girl-friends to gush with, to buy clothes & shoes with and to pig out without worrying about my diet. go see my photobucket for the rest of the pics. :)

oh no, where did january go?

its been a busy busy week. and i found out that santa forgot some of my stuff. hehehe.
click on.

Yes folks. It's true.

my dearest friend Annie does have a boyfriend. and its not imaginary. hehehe.
kidding!
dont they look great together. :)

dinner at chilis

click on the card. :)

screwed!

'nuff said. :)

warm fuzzy feeling!

since i am not in the mood to work on the forever piling job orders. i decided to work on my page before i fly to cebu. and see what i made. this is taken from last year's, when i went coffee with tabs. i then realized how long it's been since we last saw each other. i missed her
hey rose, see... mas maganda talaga ako sa girl na yun maski pareho pang black & white ang picture namin. hehehe.
later. :)

leaving for danggit

i will be leaving for cebu tomorrow...
im having separation anxiety...
i know i will miss more than one person.
HOY!!! dont have too much fun without me!
i'll be back before you know it.
hehehe!

and i was late... uber late.

i've intended to make a post for christmas (never happened).
tried (hard) to make a post for new year (again, got lost somewhere). and i have to blame it on the cannot-be- ignored job orders that just keeps on piling up and i think it has no intentions of letting up. it still multiplies by the day... sigh... screw everything!!!
i will be leaving for cebu soon. to go see my design there. (i hope we get to top the last year's award and HOPEFULLY mr president of the company will give me a raise!!! hahaha! right... like that would happen).
anyway, its late but i still want to put up the things i intend to do for the year. better late than never.
i have a lot of things to be thankful for last year. but that's another story. for now, here's my list.

catching up with annie and tiki-tiki baby

last night i was able to meet up with annie, whom i haven't seen since we were on hot pursuit of her costume for her company christmas party. well, how could she ever say no to a free dinner??? hehehe. nah, i guess she loves me enough to ditch her gimmick. anyway, went to her fave resto here in makati and started to tell stories to each other like there is no tomorrow. i wont elaborate on her adventures and latest stories. (that's the job of her blog page). one of the highlights of the night (for me that is), when i finally told her this instance that i was able to talk to o. and i told her that her suspicions were true. o likes her. and i mean LIKE, more than friends like. this got into me. i realized how many cowards are there in the world. i am not surprised that men are just falling for my friend but to find another guy who just doesn't have the balls to ask her out and formally court her? gawd. o was practically moping over her because HE realized that he's in love with her all along and he just cant take it that annie was with gil now and they are crazy about each other!!! well duhh! you had your chance! grr! when she was single & waiting for you to come around. whatdidyoudo??? you were running around with the most pathetic girl I've seen and you were so busy helping out this charity case to notice my friend. now that she's with g & happily with him at that. You're trying to win her back now... hmm... tsk tsk! so sad. but you're way too late. angsarap talaga nila pag untugin dalawa ni t. SOS! serves you right!
i wish gil would stumble on annie's page and he would see how dang lucky/blessed he is. and he should be proposing marriage now!!!hehehe! i know how crazy in love this two are with each other, a & gil, if they were cartoons and you saw them together. little hearts would be circling them. hehehe. i swear! i'd look forward to the day they would finally get married.
on the lighter note, there's this guy at work that caught my attention. soo cute. boy-next-door type. crush material talaga! 2 words for you: tiki tiki baby sya! hehehe. and i could just break into a wide grin whenever he talks to me. (ei, send me more stuff to do for you. so id see you often! hehehe!)
will talk about him soon. but let me assure the concerned citizens that this is just a crush and nothing more. cause, he likes a he. (or so that's the rumor here) hehehe. :)

all the best for the coming year! later!

and it makes me happy...

to know thats its already christmas!

days went by real fast. attending one christmas party after another. getting all this neat stuff as gifts and counting down the days when i would be able to sleep and wake up late and not think about work. just a few days wherein i am not a graphic artist swamped with cannot be ignored job orders. for a few days i am just m's girlfriend, one of the h kids and i can lay back and relive my unemployed lifestyle. hehehehe.
eventhough i have work on the 24th, i decided to just suck it up and get it over with.

fast forward... im almost late for the noche buena. hmm. i made it just before my dad starts spewing fire. hahaha! im good. made it just in time.
it wouldve been great if my mom was there and my lolo. but the world is cruel and my mom and lolo is not around.
but, that's life. we have to make do with what we have for the moment and hope that next christmas they would be with us.

during this holiday season, there's a lot i should be thankful about. one, i have a job. two, i have great family and friends and three, my baby still loves me.

and heres a list that makes me happy. happy. happy.

10 things that bring me joy:
[01] mcb
[02] friends
[03] foot spa and newly pedicured toes
[04] caffeine fix and sugar dose with annie
[05] watches, shoes and clothes
[06] late night road trips and adventures and waking up late
[07] accapella music
[08] graphic novels, books and long walks sa mall (getting a good buy)
[09] long intimate conversations (na hindi bastos.hmm, puede rin bastos! hehehe!)
[10] movie marathons

for those people who knows me, they know that this list is missing a lot of stuff because it takes little things to make me smile. hehehe.
its kinda late but for filipinos christmas is a whole month celebration. hehehe.
to all the people i love & hate. wish you well. happy christmas!

my name is... PARANOID.

it will be christmas soon. i should be jumping with joy. anticipating some cash to find its way to me.
but no... i feel restless. i dont know who to talk to. i need someone who wouldnt be on my neck and assure me that all will be okay.
i know im just paranoid. but its just me.
all i want for christmas is for it to come.
ill be the happiest girl on the planet. im broke but im happy if it finally comes along.

reggae tinkerbelle. boys room. nightcap

i had my 3rd christmas party since i got out of school last night. and again, i felt i could come up with a gazillion things that i'd rather do that night, like watch house or get some quality zzz's. anyway, there is nothing i can do but attend. and my curiosity got to the best of me. i wanted to know the reason what's all the hype about the company christmas party. so.. i sucked up all my guts and decided to bear it (and also, its an excuse to get a new top and wear my new sandals ^_^'). so went there. spent about a couple of hours watching unfamiliar faces strutting around like they were hollywood celebs during the oscars. even saw tinkerbell. visualize (green gown. layered. floucy. very short (her tush is showing). and FISHNET STOCKINGS!!!) err. nightmare. nightmare. glad she didn't win the star of the night award. (pano naging reggae yun!!!)
finally, the show started, and the moment we've been waiting for finally arrived. Time to take a bite out of the feast I've been smelling for soo long (torture if you're hungry).
people came towards the buffet table like a tsunami racing to the shore. its freaky. and scary.
thankfully, i was able to get out of the tsunami people and got back to my seat in one piece.
there i was happy and contented with my plateful of scrumptious goods (?) and right before my very eyes. SHE said "e, painom ha." and reached for his soda and blatantly drank! whatwasthat?!
i wouldnt even do that to my closest guy-friend!!! goodness. Its so freakin' obvious. gawd. please. mag propose ka na sa kanya!!! so you'd know if you're basted or what. (more likely to be basted! nyahaha!) seriously, id want her to finally find a decent guy so she wouldnt hurt or break someone else's relationship.
THE HORROR!
right then i knew i should ditch this party. soon. Its pathetic. Its sick. i just cant take it anymore.
and finally, my rescue came. the weather is not cooperating. Its drizzling and it could spell disaster to my new sandals, but who cares, as long as im with him, im good. and i know i have to make up for my last boo-boo. and i intend to tell him about issues with her. and get it all over with.
after figuring out where to go, get some good eats, i told him (first, i made sure that he shouldnt start screaming at me again. hehehe.) that im worried about her and i think that she likes (as in like) him.
then, he assured me, no, he made an oath to me that he would NEVER get together with her. ever. for two reasons. one, there's me and two, there's his friend. whew. glad that went well. i was able to find peace again. sometimes it just feels good to be reassured.

and on the lighter side,
at the reggae party, the attendees are like 500++ so you can imagine how long the queue for the girls washroom. i know id take most of the night before my turn. so i decided to sneak into the boy's room and pee. hahahah! its hard not to laugh when you see the expression on the boys' faces when we stepped out of the room. hahhaha! great. ayus. im sure that boy would never forget me.

CRY. HURT. SMS. WAR

whenever i had an arguement with m, no matter how huge or small the reason is. i feel so lousy. i knew i was in BIG trouble when we argued last saturday. all is well now, i realized how much i love him and how i could never face life without him. (insert jian: MUST BE TRUE LOVE, PARE!!!!)
whats on my mind now is how this girl always finds a way to hang out with m, (pls dont give me that shit that she is HIS gf. i already know that). there is something about her. i just have to trust him and that our relationship could endure all this. i just hope that what i saw in her page doesnt mean anything.
as my dearest friend, tabs had said "take what is rightfully yours" you bet i will.
i know i love him. i trust him. i just dont trust her and the devil inside her.
thankfully i have tabs who i can trust and would talk some sense in me.(sis, i dont know what i'd do without you. i miss you. a lot)
r also helped. she diverts my attention to other things. she cracks me up. great to have her to bash others. hehehe. :)
anyway, last night felt senti and sent m the following sms:

dec 11
* i cant remeber what my life was before i met you. im still thankful you decided to give me a chance, when i dont deserve it. thank you for not giving up on me, on our relationship. i dont want to lose you... i know i made the right decision when i decided to be with you a year ago. i know you're the one i was waiting for.

* i will never be perfect. i will make mistakes. but i will love you. always. even when you decide that you dont love me anymore.

dec 12
* psst... i love you, baby
* i do love you and you mean a lot to me in so many ways. have i told you i miss you? no? i do. i miss you a lot. the way you smile at me and hold my hand and the way you say you love me.


there. i said it. and to some people who are so dear to me. some short messages. (hopefully, you would be able to read it)

* To Annie,
annie, you will always be one of my closest friend and i owe you a lot. i cant thank you enough for giving m to me i know that i sometimes complain and it seems that its not fair for m. im sorry. i hope you would be able to find it in your heart to forgive me. let me assure you that the last thing i want is to hurt him. i love him. very much. i just have to learn. thank you for everything.

* To Tabs,
i am so grateful to have a sister in you. i know i wouldnt be able to figure out and get out of some sticky stuff if it werent for you. please. please. dont be mad at m. i know he loves me too. just pray for us. i miss you so much. will see you soon.

* To Osang,
its a great big surprise to find a friend like you at work. you made everything bearable for me. thanks!!!

And lastly. id like to share this to piece that i got from a blackeyedpeas site:

I can`t imagine life without you by my side This is LOVE, babe, that I`m feeling And I`m hoping that you`re feeling the same way... Things tend to slip my mind Like how you like to wine and dine, baby, with romantic lights You mean a lot to me in so many ways... Have I told you I love you lately? Have I told you you still mean the world to me? Have I told you I love you I`ll be your wishing well tell me what you want Don`t think twice of our love I say these things because I love you And it`s hard to explain And I`m hoping that you`re feeling the same way You know that all of mine feelings are inside And verbally I tend to forget How much I L-O-V-E U...

MY THOUGHTS. EXACTLY.

HEARTTHROB 101

this isnt what topic i had in mind when im deciding what i should write again in case id get a pocket of free time from work. but then, some things happened. hmm. some people happened and so i decided to write about this.
the heartthrob 101 is about how it was to work alongside a heartthrob. will explain in a while.
as ive said i've just started working again and now alongside with a boy.
he's great. funny and very nice. and very creative at that.
yun nga lang... HEARTTHROB sya sa department namin!!! i didnt know this until people started telling me to lay off him bacause i dont have a chance. say what??? like im looking! or any intentions to end up my relationship with m.
here's what i've learned thus far.

• can not talk to heartthrob. or expect to be ripped into shreds. (*learn sign language)
• heartthrob has a magic table wherein food would appear every single day.
• heartthrob can get away with "parinig" that he's hungry, thristy or needs a ride home and for sure he would have it in a jiffy.
• you will hear his name mentioned about 50x within a day in a top volume.
• its quite obvious that she's so head over heels with him. the way she looks at him, it could melt an iceberg or maybe strip his clothes off. hahha

well, its obvious that she loves him. nah. she worships him. i just hope she would propose to him to get it all over with. ahh. crap. poor her. poor him.
but, its great trying to get to her by trying to get heartthrob's attention and make him laugh. hehehe.
i love making her turn green. hahaha!
i hope she wouldnt notice or it will be me = unemployed again.

so IN LOVE!!!!

again, when i feel restless and down. a trip to the mall is a sure way to lift up my mood. (well, that and seeing m, duhh.) anyway, since almost everything seems to get to me, i decided to persuade r (persuade? no. invited. she gladly obliged ^_^') to go with me to the nearby mall to look at pretty clothes and pretty shoes and pretty boys! (oh. oh. shit. did i write that down) hehehe.
anyway, went around and around and just when we decided to call it a night, we dropped by on this one cute store that sells cute bags and even cuter shoes. and we both crouched down on this shelf, we both exclaimed "uyy. cute!!!" and pointed at the same pair of sandals! sheesh. we both have the same great taste. i knew i HAD to try it on. so i did. and yes, it's as if that sandals were made for me. it looked so dang good on my feet. i fell in love.
* this is one side of me that m doesnt know. i soo love shoes and the price tag is nothing but gibberish. hehehe.